Too exhausted to care
(this text is my opinion)
No surprise that, as someone from a post-Soviet country, I see war (or genocide) in Ukraine differently than my peers from Western countries. I was born in a free Lithuania, but I know that my parents’ childhood was marked by Soviets oppression. Occupation still echoes in some forms in Lithuania; in Vilnius (capital city) still, many pro-soviet old who refuse to speak Lithuanian live (even after 50+ years of living here). Not that long ago, all Soviet symbols (maybe not all) on bridges or buildings were removed; our mentality (lack of trust, close-mindedness), I’m sure, is something that we learned then and carry up until now. But surely we are moving in the right direction (or at least better).
We had a tough history with Russia, therefore, we understand - this war is super serious. We Lithuanians say Ukrainians fight for us too. We know Lithuania, Latvia, and Estonia might be the next target if Ukraine is taken over. That’s why there are a bunch of Lithuanian activists; many support funds and projects, and that’s why the Lithuanian Government support Ukraine a lot (more than a small country afford).
But now, almost 4 months passed, and less and less I think of it. I donate and read the news less frequently. Comparably, I’ve pulled myself out of this matter almost entirely. Crazy to think that not that far away (as I’m writing this, I sit in a café in Kaunas, Lithuania), children are killed, deported and raped, and entire cities are destroyed. And I can just close my eyes. What a privilege.
It’s overwhelming even to write about this (mainly because it feels like I won’t write anything good enough). Some might say what a double standard to talk about this war and not share the same feelings about other wars taking place right now. There are many reasons why we feel closer to Ukraine. Geography, history, culture, our relationships and so on. (Also, I noticed my inner conflict when I questioned if I could still care (and share) about the climate crisis.)
There’s such thing – you care about something that is more personal, close, acute.
If your hand is broken and you’re fainting from pain, probably you won’t worry about the climate crisis or the war in Ukraine. Caring for something big for a long time requires so much physical and mental strength, and if one of them is failing, it’s less likely that you will keep on giving a sh*t. And despite that closeness to Ukraine, many Lithuanians have chosen to move on. We just got used to war stuff. Killings become less shocking. It’s tiring to care for something you don’t feel powerful enough to stop.
This war is also an ecological catastrophe, not only directly (Ukrainian forests are cut down entirely by Russians, many ecosystems are destroyed, bombings cause fires and pollution from that and tanks) but also indirectly. As Y.N. Harari told in one interview, this war is exceptional as the invader is super powerful and owns nuclear weapons; both Russia and Ukraine are important producers, and because of that, global markets and money allocations are (and will be) affected. Many countries have already started strengthening their militaries, and in most cases, less ‘urgent’ sectors get financial cuts (environmental protection might be the main target to be defunded). There is a somewhat good outcome of the tragedy – many will refuse Russian gas and oil, which might trigger the quicker transition to green energy.
But the longer the war continues, the more people will die and the more brutal consequences we will feel. So sad that when all effort should be allocated to tackling the climate crisis and helping the most affected countries, Russia starts something that shifts everything.
Like with the climate crisis, this war isn’t hard to ignore, especially with time or when support is too ‘costly’. I just wanted to write something for this week’s blog to remind you and myself that it’s still happening and we have to contribute. At least a little bit.
It looked like the best thing to take the space in Storm blog.
Here are some useful links:
Donate (many options to choose even a small donation is meaningful) https://saveukraine.org/donate
How to help in the Netherlands https://dutchreview.com/news/how-you-can-help-ukraine-from-the-netherlands/
Story about Lithuanians 5 million crowdfund to buy a Bayraktar https://www.businessinsider.com/bayraktar-lithuania-crowfunds-54m-to-buy-feared-drone-for-ukraine-2022-5
Interview with Y.N.Harari https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yQqthbvYE8M&t=2s
